The Columnist
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Michael Langan
September 4, 1985

 

Dear Mr Langan,
I can testify, as Mr Kington’s secretary, that he is far too busy to answer letters, all of which I have to reply to. In fact, he is far too busy even to read them. In fact, though you probably won’t believe this, he is far too busy to write his own articles, all of which I have to write as well. What does Mr Kington do? You may well ask. I believe he spends most of his time writing Bernard Levin’s articles, as of course, Mr Levin is far too busy to write his own material.
I once asked Mr Kington how to get into journalism. “That’s not the problem,” he told me. “The problem is how to get out of journalism.”
If I were you, I would write as much as possible and send it to as many places as possible, though not to Mr Kington, who is terribly busy, though not half as busy as I am.
Yours sincerely

pp Miles Kington
Iris Volepenny, Secretary

PS I have to forge his signature as well.

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